Showing posts from October, 2025

The Armless Man's Dream: "His Face Rings a Bell!" 🛎️😂

A priest is in his church, placing prayer books among the pews when a man with …

The Amazing Frank Jones: I Married His Widow! 🚕🤵😂

A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets in…

The Fireman, the Cat's Testicles, and the "Siren" Problem! 🐱🚒😂

A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a littl…

The Hero's Last Stand: "When Did This Happen?" "About Three Minutes Ago!" 😇👊😂

A man died and was met at the pearly gates of Heaven by St. Peter himself S…

The Scottish Shepherd's "King's English" Drinking Tip! 🐑💦😂

A tourist is hiking through the Scottish Highlands and stops to tak…

Little Johnny's "Definitely" Solid Argument! 💨💩😂

A teacher asked her class to use “definitely” in a sentence. “The sky is defini…

Tarzan's "Intimate" Moment: Checking for Bees! 🐝🌳😂

Tarzan and Jane After Tarzan and Jane have gotten to know each other for a …

The Lion and the Elephant's "Temper": "He Could Have Just Said, 'I Don't Know!'" 🦁🐘😂

A lion was walking through the savanna. He comes across a boar. "Hey, …

The Kilted Scotsman's First Prize: A Blue Ribbon Discovery! 🎀🍆😂

A kilted Scotsman was walking home from a pub one morning after a night of whis…

The African Prince's 14-Inch "Problem": "Ok. I Cut, I Cut!" 🍆✂️😂

An African prince comes to the USA and meets a beautiful woman. He proposes…

The Hotel Balcony Mystery: "I Beat the S**t Out of a Ghost!" 👻💩😂

Three men check into a hotel and ask for rooms with balconies. They get the…

The Locked Keys and the Prison-Trained Professional! 🔑🏍️😂

An elderly woman rushed to the pharmacy to pick up medication, but when she ret…

The Pole's Fork Revenge: "You Won't Make S**t Out of Me!" 🇵🇱🍴😂

Japanese, American and a Pole shipwrecked on an island and got captured by the …

The Halloween Bear Costume Twist: "I Lent My Costume to Your Brother!" 🐻🎃😂

A couple was invited to a Halloween party. But the wife got a terrible headache…

The "Microsoft" Scammer vs. The Man With No Computer: "You Started It!" 📞😂

I had a phone conversation today with a very nice young chap from India Thi…

Agatha's Courtroom Confession: "He Yelled April Fool... So I Shot Him!" 👵🔫😂

An elderly woman winds up in court for murder. Defence barrister: 'Will yo…

The Autopsy and the Brainless Lawyer: "Alive and Practicing Law!" 🧠⚖️😂

This actually happened... ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autops…

The Sheriff's Nightstick Lesson: "Stop or Slow Down?" 👮‍♂️⚖️😂

A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff. He…

The Irishman's $500 Bet: A Quick Practice Run! 🍻💰😂

A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his throat to addres…

The Forgetful Couple's Breakfast: "Where's the Toast?!" 🍳🥓🍦😂

There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting…

The German's Revenge: "Stop This Spitting in the Shoes, This Peeing in the Coke!" 🚂🤮😂

A German and a Dutch man are sitting next to each other on the train.  The Germ…

The Castaway's Two Churches: One I Go To, One I Used To! 🏝️⛪😂

A castaway has been stranded on a deserted island for ten years. One day a ship…

The Lord's Light and the Mystery of the Fridge Pee! 💡🚽🥶😂

An 80 year old man went for his annual check-up the Doctor said, "For …

The Burglar, the Parrot, and the Rottweiler Named Jesus! 🦜🐕‍🦺😂

One Late Evening, a burglar broke into a house he thought was empty. Tiptoe…

The General's Misunderstanding: "It's Only 21:30!" ⏰❤️😂

A woman asked an army general when he'd last made love The general thou…

The 85-Year-Old Groom's "Impressive" Wedding Night! 👴❤️😂

At 85 years, Morris marries a lovely 25-year-old woman. Because her new husband…

The Homeless Guy's Jaguar and the House-Winning Dump! 🚓💩🏠😂

A traffic cop is standing by the road. He sees a new Jaguar speeding and pu…

The Bodybuilder's Beach Problem: "The Dang Things Are Growing Wild!" 🏖️😂

A bodybuilder was admiring his body in the mirror when he noticed he was suntan…

The Carpenter in Heaven: "Dad?" ... "Pinocchio?" 🤥🙏😂

Jesus was relaxing in Heaven when he noticed a familiar looking old man. Wonder…

The Farmer and the Widow's Alley Shortcut: "I'll Hold the Bloody Chickens!" 🐔😂

A farmer stopped by the local mechanic's shop to have his truck fixed. …

Little Johnny's "Whole Truth" Discovery: A Mailman's Hug! 🤫✉️😂

At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at…

The Priest's Mansion Problem: When a Taxi Driver Makes People Pray! 🚕🙏😂

An elderly priest dies and is welcomed at the Pearly Gates by St Peter. &qu…

The Logical Scientist's Method and the Goldfish Wanker! 🐠🧠😂

Two builders go into the pub after a hard day's work. They're sat d…

The Irish Priest's Three Questions: "Not In My Lifetime!" 🇮🇪🙏😂

An elderly Irish priest from a little village in Mayo meets God in his sleep …

The Priest's Confession: "Jesus Christ, Don't Tell Me You Missed the F***ing Putt!" ⛳️🙏😂

A man walks into confession and says "forgive me Father, for I have sinned…

The Golden Rule of Heaven: Don't Step on the Ducks! 🦆⛓️😂

Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven...... When they get th…

The DEA Agent, the Bull, and the Power of the Badge! 🐂🤠😂

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and speaks with an old ranch…

The "Buttface" Girl and the Voice from the Sewer! 👧🚽😂

A little girl runs up to her grandmother, crying. "Grandma, wh…

The Bar Confession: "My Wife Died a Year Ago!" 💀🥃😂

John goes to his buddy Steve and confesses to sleeping with the wife of his fri…

The Doctor's Prediction: Watching for the Star and Three Wise Men! 🌟👶😂

A woman takes her 18 -year-old daughter to the doctor. Doctor: Okay, Mrs. O…

The Pope's $100 Million Deal: Losing the Wonder Bread Account! 🍗🍞😂

A man goes to see the Pope. "Your Holiness. I work for KFC, and we'…

The Irishman's Tradition: Two Pints Means... He Quit Drinking! 🍻😂🇮🇪

An Irishman goes to a new pub, sits down and orders three pints of Guinness. Th…

The Genie's Last Wish: "So Sue Me!" 🧞‍♂️⚖️😂

A guy finds an old lamp and rubs it. Of course a genie appears and grants the g…

The Amazing Sharon Smith and Her Widowed Husband's New Ride! 🚕👰😂

A woman leaves a late-night bar in the pouring rain and hops into a cab. Th…

The "Rubbing" Confession: "$50 on the Box, Same as Putting It In!" 💰🙏😂

A man entered the confessional and told his priest, "I almost had an affai…

The Prayerful Parrots: "Our Prayers Have Been Answered!" 🦜🙏😂

"Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know h…

Jenny, Jock, and the "Gruesome" Discovery Under the Kilt! 😂🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Jenny and Jock are sitting on a park bench when she says "You know, Jock, …

The Gravestone Age Contest: Miles from Dublin Wins at 147! 🍻👴😂

Paddy and Mick are drunk in a graveyard Paddy starts reading the gravestone…

The First-Timer's Misunderstanding of the "69"! 💨😂

A guy goes to a whorehouse for the first time. The girl comes in and says, &quo…

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