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Sister Mary's Relief: "I Thought You Said a Protestant!" ⛪😇😂

The Word That Took Down Sister Mary The morning sun streamed through the ta…

The Cheater's Excuse: "Is There Anything Else Your Wife Doesn't Use?" 💋🛌😂

My wife came home early and caught me in bed with a beautiful woman! She sc…

The Prosthetic Hand Bargain: "Buy Your Third Hand Second Hand First Hand!" 👋💰😂

A man lost his hand in a war and goes to a shop to purchase a prosthetic hand. …

The Father's Secret: "He's Not Your Father Anyway!" 👨‍👦💍😂

A guy decides to get married. — Well, Dad, I've decided! I'm gonna …

The Farmer's Line in the Sand: "Because I Do Have Two Cows!" 🐄💰😂

A journalist interviews a farmer: "if you have two bungalows, are you will…

The Car Crash and the Seals: "I Train Navy Seals, Not Dolphins!" 🚗🐬😂

A man rear-ended a guy driving an expensive sports car. Enraged, the guy ho…

The Armed Grandma's Reply: "Not a Goddamn Thing!" 👵🔫😂

Cop pulls over a little old lady and asks for her licence and registration. …

The Husband's Midnight Revelation: "I Would've Been Getting Out of Prison Today..." 😭💔😂

A woman wakes up in the middle of the night and realizes that her husband is no…

The Jewish Prisoner's Language Skills: "No Problem. I Already Speak Russian!" 📚🔥😂

A guard in a Russian jail goes to the library and sees an old Jewish political …

The Park Bench Mystery: "You Don't Look Jewish!" 🤔🌳😂

A man is sitting on a park bench enjoying a nice summer day A woman walks b…

The NHL Coaches and the Peculiar Babies: "I'm the Coach of the New Jersey Devils!" 🏒😈😂

Three NHL coaches are waiting outside the delivery unit as their wives are all …

The Brothers' Swearing Pact: "It Won't Be Flippin' Froot Loops!" 🥣🤬😂

A 9-year-old and 6-year old brother are in their room one morning. The 9-ye…

The Blonde's Calculus Punchline: "Plus a Constant of Integration!" 🧠➕C😂

A blonde is waiting table for a couple of guys, and one of them is telling a lo…

A politician visits a remote Native American community

A politician visits a remote Native American community. With news crews fol…

Harold's Heavenly Reincarnation: You St the Bed! 🥚🛌😂

Harold got real drunk one night, Ubered home, and snuck in bed beside his wife……

The Medicare Therapy Scam: Cheaper Than the Holiday Inn! 💵🏨😂

A couple, both age 78, went to a sex therapist's office. The doctor asked,…

The Rolls Royce Loan Trick: $15.41 Parking in NYC! 🚗💰😂

A wealthy man walks into a bank New York City and asks for the loan officer. …

The Pope's Hairdresser Critique: "Who *** Up Your Hair?" 💇‍♀️🇻🇦😂

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome…

The Honest Student and His Favorite Famous Person: Colonel Sanders! 🍗😂

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken.…

The Seven-Year-Old Groom: "We've Been Lucky So Far!" 💍👶😂

A seven-year-old boy is sitting at the dinner table with his parents. Suddenly …

The Plumber's Calculus Secret: "Swap the Limits of Integration!" 🔧📐😂

A math professor noticed his kitchen sink at home was leaking. He called a…

The World-Saving Genie: "You Wished the Icelandic-Tongan War Never Happened!" 🧞‍♂️🌍😂

A joke I just made up about a genie Genie: hi I am a genie you have 3 wishe…

The Shoplifter's Husband: Confessing the Bag of Rice! 🍎🍚😂

A married woman is caught shoplifting a bag of apples. In court the judge s…

Little Johnny's Disgusting Sales Strategy: The Government Method! 💩💰😂

Monday morning at school, the teacher lined up all the students to present thei…

The Rooster's Final Act: "Shhh... They Are About to Land." 🐓🦅😂

A farmer buys a new young rooster when his old rooster can't "perform&…

The Rooster Race Twist: "Third Damn Gay Rooster I Bought This Month!" 🐓🏳️‍🌈😂

A farmer buys a new rooster and brings it home. Upon seeing the new young roost…

The Glamorous Woman's Secret: Stung... at Walmart! 💄🛒😂

A woman goes to the doctor looking fantastic: hair and makeup done by a profess…

The Blonde, the Quarterback, and the 25-Cent Mystery! 🏈😂

Took my blonde girlfriend to her first football game. I took my blonde girl…

The Heavenly Divorce Problem: "How Long to Find a Lawyer?!" 😇💍😂

A man and his wife die and meet St Peter at the pearly gates "Please c…

The Genie's Last Meal Wish: Chicken or Fish? 🧞‍♂️🍗😂

A boy found a magic lamp one day and out came a genie who exclaimed "I sha…

The Skinny Lumberjack and the Sahara "Forest" Secret! 🌳🏜️😂

The Skinny Lumberjack A very thin fellow wandered into a lumberjacking outf…

The Boy's Confession: "Don't Start This Nonsense Again!" 💰🤫😂

A woman spends the day with her lover while her husband is at work Her husb…

The Priest's Customs Declaration: A Marvelous Unused Instrument! ✈️🍆😂

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the priest beside her,…

The Cannibals' Fruit Challenge: "I Saw Harry Coming Back with Pineapples!" 🍍🍑😂

Three men are captured by cannibals. They are taken to the chief, who says …

The Golfer, the Saleswoman, and the "One Hole Behind You" Pun! 🏌️‍♀️😂

A man was out on the golf course one sunny day when he realized he was complete…

The Armless Man's Dream: "His Face Rings a Bell!" 🛎️😂

A priest is in his church, placing prayer books among the pews when a man with …

The Amazing Frank Jones: I Married His Widow! 🚕🤵😂

A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets in…

The Fireman, the Cat's Testicles, and the "Siren" Problem! 🐱🚒😂

A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a littl…

The Hero's Last Stand: "When Did This Happen?" "About Three Minutes Ago!" 😇👊😂

A man died and was met at the pearly gates of Heaven by St. Peter himself S…

The Scottish Shepherd's "King's English" Drinking Tip! 🐑💦😂

A tourist is hiking through the Scottish Highlands and stops to tak…

Little Johnny's "Definitely" Solid Argument! 💨💩😂

A teacher asked her class to use “definitely” in a sentence. “The sky is defini…

Tarzan's "Intimate" Moment: Checking for Bees! 🐝🌳😂

Tarzan and Jane After Tarzan and Jane have gotten to know each other for a …

The Lion and the Elephant's "Temper": "He Could Have Just Said, 'I Don't Know!'" 🦁🐘😂

A lion was walking through the savanna. He comes across a boar. "Hey, …

The Kilted Scotsman's First Prize: A Blue Ribbon Discovery! 🎀🍆😂

A kilted Scotsman was walking home from a pub one morning after a night of whis…

The African Prince's 14-Inch "Problem": "Ok. I Cut, I Cut!" 🍆✂️😂

An African prince comes to the USA and meets a beautiful woman. He proposes…

The Hotel Balcony Mystery: "I Beat the S**t Out of a Ghost!" 👻💩😂

Three men check into a hotel and ask for rooms with balconies. They get the…

The Locked Keys and the Prison-Trained Professional! 🔑🏍️😂

An elderly woman rushed to the pharmacy to pick up medication, but when she ret…

The Pole's Fork Revenge: "You Won't Make S**t Out of Me!" 🇵🇱🍴😂

Japanese, American and a Pole shipwrecked on an island and got captured by the …

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