An 80-year-old man was asked for a sperm count by his doctor as part of his physical exam...
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a sample tomorrow."
The next day, the 80-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.
The doctor asked him what happened.
The man explained, "Well doc, it’s like this. First I tried with my right hand, but nothing."
"Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing."
"Then I asked my wife for help... "
"She tried with her right hand, and then with her left, and still nothing."
"She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, and then with her teeth out, still nothing."
"We even called up Arleen, the lady next door, and she tried too, first with both hands... "
"Then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing."
The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?"
The old man replied, "Yep... "
"None of us could get the jar open."
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